I can't figure out what is going on with me. Lately i have felt happy and content, but now I am feeling like I'm missing out on something, like something is wrong. i don't want to live this way. I feel so all alone. i feel like i am missing out on something. the tears come so easily, and i can't explain why. i'm afraid if i tell my family what i'm feeling they'll judge me and find me not up to their expectations. I am just a person, like many others, but with a lot more baggage.
One of the worst things, beyond the pain, is this stupid fatigue. I can barely get out of bed some days. and even out of bed, i find i physically can't get anything done because the two things together make me feel like i'm going to collapse. this is making it very hard on dave, who i then count on to do everything. i need someone or something to give me a kick in the ass, and force me to get up and do the dishes and clean the house, even if that means i'm bawling my eyes out while doing it.
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